Things to Consider Before Choosing an Agency (and Country):
Choosing an agency is a very personal decision. What makes a good agency to one person many not be a good one for you. Everyone has different expectations, needs, and wants. The first step to choosing an agency is to make yourself a good consumer. Remember that adoption agencies are businesses providing services for a fee. Spend at least one to two months investigating all alternatives before deciding what is best for you. Networking with others is invaluable. It is fine to use an agency that is out-of-state. Most agencies are. Attend adoptive parent support group events and talk to others. You can also check out the agency registries on this website, eeadopt.com, and frua.org. This offers a means for people to contact adoptive families who have used a particular agency and ask questions. You are getting these references on your own. Remember, an agency will give you references, but they will only give you references of families that they know had a positive experience. Some things to consider when making your decision:
1. How much "hand holding" do you expect? Sometimes larger agencies simply cannot call you back immediately.
2. What age and sex child do you want? Some agencies work in 60 to 70 baby homes and others may only work in one or two, therefore the wait may be longer for younger children. There are pros and cons to both big and small agencies. For example, the wait may be shorter with a larger agency. With a smaller agency, they may know their orphanages and orphanage directors extremely well. This is possible when dealing in only a few orphanages..
3. How much support does the agency offer once you return home? Do they listen and try to help with any issues you may be facing? What other support services does the agency provide? What help, specifically, is given to families experiencing post-placement difficulties?
4. What countries does the agency work in? What if one country closes? Do you have a second choice and does the agency work in this country too?
5. Fee policies are very important. How much money to you pay to the agency before your referral? How much is refundable if you change your mind? Make sure that you understand what fees you will be charged and when they are due. Be suspicious if an agency requires that all fees (or a large %) be paid up front.
6. Costs - It is very difficult to compare agencies. The cost can range anywhere from $30,000 to$55,000 for a Russian adoption (Some agencies cost more than others but this does NOT necessarily mean that one is better than the other). Ask the agency for an estimate of the TOTAL cost of an adoption. (including everything - travel, in-country expenses, gifts, donations to the orphanage, visas, INS fees, homestudy, etc). It can sometimes be difficult to get a straight answer from them regarding TOTAL cost. It can be deceiving because you will be paying for things outside of the total agency fee (your homestudy. passport, notary/apostilling, INS, travel, etc.). For most, the cost is usually a little higher than expected. You sometimes have to really pull this out of an agency when you ask for a total cost. Many families add about $3000 to $4000 to their estimated cost and get close to the "actual cost" of their entire adoption.
7. How much information will you receive on a child before you travel to the country? Will you get a video, picture, medical report? This is always changing, so ask you agency. For some regions and countries, you may not know anything about the child, except for an age range. Ask specifics about this and make sure you are comfortable with the procedure before committing to the agency.
8. How long will you be in your child's country and how many trips are required?
9. Will the agency let you adopt two children at one time (even if they are unrelated)?
10. Can you request the sex of your child?
11. How many regions does the agency work in? Sometimes regions can slow down for a variety of reasons, so if your agency is in more than one region, your wait won't be extended.
12. Make sure the workers are professional, licensed social workers and have experience in adoption.
13. Find out how long the agency has operated and how many children they have placed in recent years. Ask the agency about its professional affiliations such as Council on Accreditation, Joint Council on International Children's Services.
14. You can also call the Better Business Bureau in the state where the agency is licensed to check whether any complaints have been filed against the agency.
15. Of course the most important thing to research is the ethical practices of an agency. Make sure to do your homework in this area!
RED FLAGS
1. If something sounds too good to be true, it probably is. If the agency is giving you promises dramatically different from other agencies, this can be a red flag.
2. If they offer you a child before you have even filed your initial application with them, be suspicious.
3. If they call you over and over again, trying to pressure you into using their agency, be suspicious.
4. If they send you pictures of children and try to pressure you this way, be careful. If they try to appeal to your emotional side by telling you "sad stories" of children that need families immediately, be very suspicious.
5. If they ask for a large amount of money up front, be suspicious. There are many agencies out there that will not require that you pay anything (or very little) until you actually accept a referral (this is a good practice)..
6. They seem very unorganized and you can't speak to the same person twice, be suspicious.
7. If you call to get an informational packet several times and you only get an answering machine, be suspicious. They may be very under staffed.
8. If they claim that they only place healthy babies and have never had any problems with any of the children they have placed, be very suspicious. In my own personal experiences, this can mean that they are disconnected with post-adoptive families and don't know any of problems, they turn a deaf ear when families do call them seeking help after adoption, and they just "drop the ball" once the family has returned and they have been paid in full.
9. If you get "bad vibes", move on. This agency is not right for you.
*Taking the time and effort to carefully select an adoption agency may save you a great deal of unnecessary stress and loss. Choosing the right one will help improve (but never guarantee) that your adoption process will go smoothly.
